Animals & Pets

Bad Monsters

Trying to pass themselves off as monsters, but the smile in their eyes keeps giving it away.

Real Hero (fem)

Anyone can slay a dragon, she told me, but try waking up every morning & loving the world all over again. That’s what takes a real hero.

Real Hero (no gender)

Anyone can slay a dragon, but try waking up every morning & loving the world all over again. That’s what takes a real hero.

Wonder Roast

He just sat in the church looking up at nothing in particular & I whispered what are you doing? & he said if Jesus had been a chicken would we have Weber grills all over the place instead of crosses? & I had a hard time concentrating after that, too.

Wolf Angel

this is a wolf angel & it eats the people it’s supposed to help. A wolf angel is not a good angel to have looking out for you.

White Birds

I have always thought that stars turn into white birds in the morning light & sleep with their heads under their wings until the dusk begins to walk through the streets.

Well Behaved

They’re like pets who shed clothes instead of hair, she said, & they talk back & want a lot of stuff. But at least they don’t pee on the carpet anymore, she added.

Whales

I remember when the whales had wings, she said. Whatever happened? I said. It got to be too noisy with all the airplanes & other stuff, so they flew into the ocean & never came back. Some days, she added, I think about going too.

Walking Softly

walking softly like a spider in the early morning

Watching Ants

I would like to think more about baseball & small engines & the best weedkiller known to man, but I always end up watching the ants on my back porch, thinking we’re not so different after all.

Two Wise Men

My great-aunt Clara told us once about the time she was one of the wise men in the church play & when it came to her part she said we’re here bearing frankincense, gold & myrrh, heavy on the frankincense because of that camel smell & after that her father always called it the story of the Two Wise Men & that other guy & we laughed so hard we had to pee.

Tofu Pup

taunting the neighbor’s dog with meat-flavored tofu because he can’t get anyone else to eat it.

Three Blind Mice

I tried for a whole summer to teach our cat to play the piano. We started with an easy song. It was 3 Blind Mice. My dad said it didn’t work because the cat had a tin ear, but I think it was because she kept looking around for the blind mice the whole time & never gave it her full attention.

Tidy Dinosaur

You have to admit even though I’m a dinosaur, I’m rather tidy.

Tiger Rain

Her umbrella was filled with rain she had collected in her travels & on hot summer days she would open it up for the neighborhood kids & we would splash in the puddles & then it would smell like Nairobi or Tasmania & later on we would sit on the porch & eat ice cream & watch for tigers in the bushes.

The Whole World

My favorite thing is being your lap while we sit there together & love the whole world.

Spider Princess

If I was a spider princess, she said, I would spin webs the color of sky & catch drops of sunlight to give to children who watch too much TV & then everyone would remember to come outside to play. If I was a spider princess, she said, things would be different.

Short Leash

Is convinced there’s something we can learn from the animals, but so far all she can think of is that you should shut up when someone’s got you on a leash.

Secret Warning

He ran quickly with a sound like raindrops & left his handwriting in all the secret places. I found this one underneath the big yellow rock in the garden. It said this: watch out for the little black dog. It can smell when you’ve had hot dogs.

Self-Conscious

He is self-conscious because everyone knows he has wings but they’ve never seen him fly. Now & then there will be a feather in odd places or maybe a footprint to show he was there. All in all, he thinks it’s nobody else’s business what he does with his free time.