Condolence & Loss

Earthmother (for Heidi)

When I think of you, it is with thoughts of butterflies and flowers. I did not know their names until you told me, like a precious secret, like this knowledge was the only true wealth, and how lucky that we could be rich together. Perhaps I would not know to love the world from the roots up, as you do, without your quiet enthusiasm for everything that grows.
It might seem a perilous undertaking of the spirit, to see what beauty is still alive in this world of smoke, and speed, and fear, but as I question if there is hope for us in the times to come, I remember you in your garden, smiling, and showing us that hope is everywhere if you know where to look.

Spark

There are more with a spark like the one you carry in your loving heart, so I know we will never be lost.

Closet Optimist

This isn’t a popular opinion, but secretly I think things are going to work out.

Real Hero (fem)

Anyone can slay a dragon, she told me, but try waking up every morning & loving the world all over again. That’s what takes a real hero.

Boundless

This is the
kind of love
that just keeps
going.

Listening Well (for Erik) (fem)

She had the gift of stopping time & listening well so that it was easy to hear who we could become & that was the future she held safe for each of us in her great heart & you may ask, what now? & I hope you understand when we speak softly among ourselves & do not answer just yet for our future is no longer the same without her.

Words of Comfort

There are days I drop words of comfort on myself like falling rain & remember it is enough to be taken care of by myself.

Wish List

I wish you could have been there for the sun & the rain & the long, hard hills. For the sound of a thousand conversations scattered along the road. For the people laughing & crying & remembering at the end. But, mainly, I wish you could have been there.

Value of a Nickel

I buried a nickel under the porch when I was 8, she said, but one day my grandma died & they sold the house & I never got to go back for it. A nickel used to mean something, I said. She nodded. It still does, she said & then she started to cry.

Treasures

The most important thing you leave behind is the stuff that turns into treasures when children find it.

Thousand Moments

I still remember the day the world took you back & there was never time to thank you for the thousand scattered moments you left behind to watch us while we slept.

Stand Still

The loss is not yours alone, she said & you will see it in their eyes when they do not think you are watching. How long does it take? I said & she put her hand on my chest & we did not speak.

Smaller World

I know he’s not really gone, she said, but the world still feels smaller to me today.

Silver Needle

Each night, all the years we were growing up, she sat in the big yellow rocking chair & pieced together our lives with countless stitches of her silver needle.

Side by Side

We sat side by side in the morning light & looked out at the future together.

Silver Cord

connected by a silver cord that hums with sadness the further it is stretched

Scent

When she wore the hat, even many years later, she could always smell her mother’s perfume & it was hard to remember she was supposed to be alone.

Scraps of Magic

These are little scraps of magic & when you paste them together you get a memory of something fine & strong, she said. Sometimes it takes till you’re 40 to see it though.

Real Hero (masc)

Anyone can slay a dragon, he told me, but try waking up every morning & loving the world all over again. That’s what takes a real hero.

Real Reason

There are things you do because they feel right & they may make no sense & they may make no money & it may be the real reason we are here: to love each other & to eat each other’s cooking & say it was good.