Humor & Whimsy
Positive Thinking
Leaving a trail of destruction behind her
even though her current affirmation is happy happy joy joy.
Plumber
The plumber was digging around in the pipes & he saw something shine in the muck & it turned out to be the soul of the last tenant. He gave it to me & I said I wonder how we can return it & he shrugged & said he found stuff like that all the time. You’d be amazed what people lose, he said.
Pockets
She had a big coat with pockets she filled with crackers & cheese & little wrapped chocolates in case (she said) she ever got trapped too far from a convenience store. I don’t take civilization for granted, she said.
Pig Cat
Your cat seems very healthy,
I said to her.
That is not a cat,
she said.
That is a pig
in cat’s clothing.
Pillar of Flame
One summer night, we took my parents’ grill & we put in some sticks & paper & soaked the whole thing in lighter fluid & then my friend turned on his shortwave radio & we listened to some scientist in Houston who was saying where Apollo was at that moment & at the exact time it went over us, we lit the stuff in the grill so the astronauts would look out & see this light & they’d say ‘What the hell is that?’ & we danced around the pillar of flame & sparks laughing wildly because while the astronauts were out there unlocking the mysteries of the universe, we were back home in Chicago making more of them.
Pineapple Milkshake
This is a barrel filled with fish bones & pieces of old rubber cement & it smells like a pineapple milkshake. I have no explanation for why this is so. Chemistry was never my strongest subject.
Piranha Fear
I can’t take a bath, he said, or the piranhas will get me. Don’t worry about that, I said, Piranhas only eat clean people. You’ve got nothing to fear.
Perpetual Motion
Perpetual Motion Machine: this is the life that needs no words, this is the life that does
Personal Business
There was a whole world here once, she said, but some of the smaller parts left on personal business & it’s not that easy to find replacements.
Personal Plateau
I don’t want another opportunity to learn & grow, she said. I just want to eat crackers & watch Oprah & pet my cat.
Perspective
standing on the shoulders of midgets, so even though she sees farther than most every one of her acquaintance, it’s still mostly the crotches of big people
Pesky Growth
I finally got to exactly where I wanted to be,
she said, so why won’t all these growth experiences
go away & leave me alone?
Perfectly Anxious
missing a perfectly good day because she’s sure that she should be anxious about something
Perpetual Change
I’ve never been that good at complaining, she told me, because I’m going to be dead in another 50 years & it’s all going to change then anyway.
Perfect Combination
We need a letter that’s like i & u together for when we’re doing stuff like this, he said & I hugged him & said a lot of people want a letter like that.
Perfect Match
Sometimes you just need the right accessory, she said & I said I know, sometimes it takes me an hour to pick the right head & she just ignored me.
Perfect Sense
All this stuff will make perfect sense later on, he used to say, if you can remember enough of it.
Pep Talk
I like change, she said, as long as I remember I like change.
Partners
Tied together by stuff too difficult to explain to someone new
Past Vegetarians
I had vegetarians in my past, she said, but they’re gone now and I’m a lot happier.