Job & Career
Goddess
I do much better as a goddess, she said, since my secretarial skills have always been limited
Free Will
That’s the thing about free will, he told us. You can drag me along, but there’s no way in hell you can make me have fun.
Front Porch
My grandpa used to tell us about a man who had 3 heads who lived in his town & he was always in the kitchen frying something or other & even though it smelled like chicken it was really the bones of children. He was awake every time I saw him, my grandpa said, even late at night & we decided maybe he had 3 or 4 jobs but that’s what you need with so many mouths to feed & then my grandma would make us come in & watch educational television for our own good.
Full Day
I think I’m having a heart attack, she said, but it’s dragging on for hours. I told her not to worry. That’s how most people who work a full day feel, I said.
Finger Sprouts
My uncle Obert had only 3 fingers on his left hand. He lost the others during corn planting one spring. My fingers are buried out in these fields somewhere, he used to tell us & I check for them every summer to see if they’ve sprouted yet. I asked him once what he’d do if they ever did sprout. He thought for a minute. I’d run like hell, he said, & never look back & then he made us promise not to tell my aunt.
First Thing
He tried hard to tell the truth but it wasn’t always that obvious, so usually he just said the first thing that came to mind.
Flashback
I’ve been having the hardest time today coming up with excuses, she said. I think that I’m having a work ethic flashback.
Dream World
I mainly want someone to tell me I’m right & then pay me, he said. Is that too much to ask?
& I said as long as you’re living in a dream world, you might as well make it work for you.
Day Job
This holds all the stuff you haven’t been listening to & when the top comes off, it all starts to talk at once & it makes you glad you have a day job so you can get away for part of the time.
Belly of the Pig
Every day he stood in front of the Bank of America. You’re trapped in the belly of a big pink pig, he said. We ignored him. We had work to do.
Balance
If you had to balance as much stuff as I do, she said, you’d take an hour in the bathroom every morning too.
A to Z
1st Story (on all versions): My mother always told me to finish what I started, but she had no idea of some of the people I’d be dealing with.
2nd Story (only on sculpture with block) called Obvious Mistake: Some of the stuff I learned early on was useful, she told me, but most of it was obviously meant for someone who was not me.